After a much appreciated two week break I return to work today, which means what you're reading now was actually written last night and scheduled for posting today. Naturally as a teacher I'm not able to blog during the work day--on a typical day there's little time for stopping to reflect. However, by the time I get home there's plenty to consider and to reflect about.
As a part of my blogging I've never written much about the work that I do except indirectly. There's great deal of confidentiality that has to be observed in special education. For a teacher in general, blogging about work takes special precaution. Administrators, understandably, tend to guard what is written or said about a school in the media. Thus, I'll most likely never mention the location of my school or give too many details of the events that transpire during the day. However, what happens during the day each day at work is of utmost importance and has a deep personal effect. It gets into what I have to say here regardless.
Like everyone else, what happens to me during my work day has both spiritual and physical outcomes. If I didn't already make a resolution to exercise more this year, I should now because the work that I do takes a tremendous amount of energy--plus there's plenty of work that can be taken home. I give myself a short window of time for homework because I have a wife and children who need my attention. Being a teacher, a husband and father, and a deacon all roll together to form my identity, but there are some aspects of my life that must come before others. Being a husband and father have to take precedence over everything else--I frequently say that family is my real life outside of everything else I do, though I know it's difficult to separate one aspect of life from another in actuality.
If I plan to blog daily, to exercise, to do my homework, to offer time at the parish to meet with people and serve along with my wife as a religious education catechist for cognitively disabled children, and to pursue personal endeavors such as my interest in classical guitar, I really have to depend on God's assistance. So I pray that God will help me be fast and effective as well as organized and energetic. I don't want to disappear from the blogosphere again for a lengthy period because I learned that writing has the great spiritual consequence of increasing the vision of my faith.
I also want to avoid having negative feelings or anxiety about anything that I do, or about anyone with whom relate personally. For me it's a challenge because I tend to have anxiety easily. It's something I've noticed since I was a teenager. Every Sunday when the priest prays at Mass that God will free us from all anxiety I especially emphasize it in my own soul. Part of living a victorious Christian life is learning to be free from the bondage of fear. Realistically it's hard work but it can be accomplished.
So I'm returning to work today with the resolve to get as much out of every aspect of life as I can. It's a new year and I'm coming into it expecting good things. It's never too late in life to see what will result from a great expense of human energy. I only pray that those who work with me, especially my students, will benefit from whatever efforts I put forth. I'm not so worried about burning out provided that I'm able to sit on the sofa occasionally on Saturday or Sunday afternoon and fall asleep for an hour while my kids are watching cartoons.
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