Weddings at churches are commonplace weekend events. Just this this weekend I celebrated a
wedding where the first reading was the same as we have for the Mass today. Had
the couple chosen the same New Testament and Gospel readings I could have just
used the same homily, except then I’d be telling you to go forth and remember
this day as the day in your marriage when you loved each other the least.
Somehow I don’t think that it would have worked.
As I looked at the
lectionary for today I thought it strange—maybe even a little humorous— that we
have a reading about suffering wedged in between two stories about marriage. I
was tempted to throw in Woody Allen’s “to love is to suffer dialogue,” but I’d
never be able to recover from it if I did, and you would probably never forgive
me. It’s best to get on to the deeper meanings. There is a mystery to explore.
In the very beginning, when God began to form all things
and place in us the breath of life, that which God is, God created a
partnership with humanity. Today is a good day to talk about life and the
relationship that forms out of it. It’s Respect Life Sunday, and the month of
October is Respect Life month. So it makes for a good meditation to consider
life today.
At the time of creation God set men and women as
stewards of the earth giving us a share in creation and establishing an
original ecology where human beings had interconnection and interrelatedness
with all things, and especially we had it with each other. The man saw the
connection that God had created and he looked upon the woman and said of her,
“This is bone of of my bones and flesh of my flesh.”
In the gospel today, we find the one time on record that
Jesus taught about marriage. Today it’s from Mark’s gospel but it’s also
repeated in Matthew and Luke. It’s a synoptic story. All three versions tell of
the same event and make the same point: there is something so unique and so
original about marriage that it can’t be lawfully dissolved. God created us for
each other, and again in the act of marrying we say to each other, “You are
bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh… what happens to you happens also to
me.”
It is no accident that today’s gospel moves from the
encounter with the Pharisees over a matter of law into the telling of the story
of Jesus and the little children. It makes perfect sense when we consider that
children are the natural result of the union of man and woman. God gives us a
role in creation. It’s been that way from the beginning. Life is imparted to
us, and we share life through the act of love.
This story of Jesus and the children bears a special
importance to me. I recall being about five years old and my great aunt who
brought me up called me into the kitchen. “Danny,” she said, “there’s something
I want to share with you.” She brought out the family bible and turned to the
story of Jesus and the little children. It was the same one we heard today.
Backtracking just a bit, it’s important to note
something. I was born as the child of a teenage girl in the late 1950s in a
small town in a bleak and desolate part of northwest Texas that had little more
than an attitude and a few oil field pumps. I was with my great aunt and great
uncle because the gift of adoption.
My great aunt told me there was something so special
about little children that the Lord himself said that if we don’t become like
them we would not enter his kingdom. I spent years trying to figure out what
could possibly have been meant by that. I’m a schoolteacher and I’ve taught
elementary, middle school, and high school, and I’m a parent of three kids
myself. I have to say, knowing kids, I’m not sure exactly what Jesus
was getting at. Seriously though, I love kids, though I know sometimes we all
have our more difficult moments.
The story of Jesus and the little children contains the
great lesson that we are to depend on God as our heavenly parent in the same
way that a little baby depends on his or her mom or dad—or even aunts and
uncles or grandparents—to provide everything. In the same way, God, our
heavenly parent, provides everything for us. We are like little
children—babies—held in the arms of the living God.
From the storehouse of creation God gives us enough for
today and some for tomorrow. The story of Jesus and the children, if we delve
into it and meditate upon it, also teaches us of the reciprocity inherent in
our relationship the Divine. We too are to give to others completely and fully,
even sacrificially. This is an important thing for spouses to consider,
especially when marriage presents its trials.
I’ve been married for almost 20 years and I have a good
marriage. I love my wife, but I would be a liar if I said that there had never
been any time of difficulty. Marriage takes hard work, and sometimes it might
even seem a bit like suffering—sometimes, in some of our lives, the suffering
is real and tragic no doubt—but thankfully for most of us, given the right
effort, marriage can become the greatest of all blessings. Here I believe it is
important to realize the non-judgmental nature of grace. No one should be
daunted because of the failure of a marriage. Again, in God there is fullness
of grace.
Those of us who have children know how joyful it is to
be parents, but we also admit that suffering can part of parenthood too. Often
it’s out of our hands. There may be suffering because of disease or disability,
or just because life with kids brings challenges our way. We look at our
children and to them too we say, “You are bone of my bones and flesh of my
flesh…what happens to you happens to me.” The eternal breath of life that is
the source of all that is and all that will ever be, the eternal, invisible,
ineffable name, also desired throughout time to say to us, “You are bone of my
bones and flesh of my flesh.”
Jesus’ life is one that restores the original connection
between God and us. Jesus mends the unlawful divorce that had occurred between
humanity and our source. The mending took pain. We know all too well the events
of the Passion, but through it that relationship which was broken was healed
and restored. God now invites us on this sixth day to enter into the Sabbath
rest.
Jesus is the one about whom the eternal and holy God can
say, “This my flesh and bone; my body and my blood.” By Jesus’ humanity, which
he shares as one of us, we become known to God. We become the children of the
one who made all things, and that one now says to us “You are mine now, and I
feel what you feel. We are of one body”
The creator invites us to commune with each other and
with all that God is and with all that God has made. We are invited to
participate in a reestablished relationship, a new original ecology with the
breath of life that flows in all things, and in an irrevocable new covenant
with God. The relationship we hold is one that no law, no power, no force on
earth, can ever eradicate—there is no place for fear at all—for we are married
to our maker forever.
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